At Least out Loud
by Yamchas Big Pants
Summary: Hercules fic Megara/Meg contemplates the days events and how Wonderboy has turned her world upside down! End of movie fic which contains spoilers. VERY fluffy!


I step outside onto the veranda. The day had gone by like a hurricane, both the best and worst day of me life. But the party inside right now is too much for me. I rub my bare arms and look out over the cityscape of Thebes. Through the darkness the world is lit. A carnival is being held to praise "Wonderboy" for his amazing and heroic deeds. Indeed, that very day he had saved the city from complete destruction and prevented cosmic take-over. However most importantly for me, he had saved my life. 

I had hated to admit how I felt at first. I'd been hurt before and knew what it was like to have my heart broken. Inside I had desperately needed Hercules not to be like other men. At first he was hard to believe. A man like him, so handsome, so heroic, he had to be a total jerk. But as I watched him, as clutzy as he was, I couldn't help but think that maybe my first impressions had been wrong. Maybe he could be as innocent and as good as he looked. However past experience hadn't let me express what my heart felt. I simply ignored the good that surrounded him everywhere he went.

I was cold, hard and untouchable inside. Men hated me and I hated them right back. My own father had walked out on my mother and I when I was only a little girl.  Even when I thought I could forgive and forget, a man had taken my heart, and my very soul! Hades, well, he was the last straw, he toyed with me as though I was a puppet on a string. And someone could wonder why I had "sworn off man-handling" ?  Ha! There had never been anyone since my mother who had come close to making me feel the way "Wonderboy" did. I had tried so hard to resist him, but damn him, he broke through. It was all in that kiss.

I sit down on one of the stone benches that adorn the beautiful gardens of the villa. The stars are beginning to peak out around the new constellation. I smile warmly to myself and clutch my arms tighter, blocking out the chill of impending night. It still hadn't sunk in yet. So much had happened in the past two days that I couldn't come to terms with yet. That danged kiss. That simple platonic peck on the cheek had been enough to set my insides a-fluttering. When he'd said he would never hurt me, I felt like the sun shone from his face alone. I believed him. So fully in fact that I had almost let my heart rule my head. Not very me-like I must say. But who could resist him? None of other girls anywhere in Greece, that was for sure. Yet again I had been alone in this too. I look down at my hands, frowning slightly. But it hadn't taken me long to find out something about Hercules that I had never bargained for. 

He had been alone too. For a very long time he'd been left down on Earth. Feeling like a freak, but in reality more like a shooting star he had struggled just to be normal and to find someone he could trust. Look at him now! He was a heavenly heroic hunk! Any woman would give her toga just to catch the eye of the demi-god. But what had I done? Broken his heart! For the longest time I had thought that being rejected and betrayed was the worst feeling in the world, but there was a feeling much worse. The feeling of **betraying** someone. To see him slump to the ground when he had found out I was working for Hades, had pulled me apart with guilt. He pushed me away and I felt my whole world collapse. I couldn't make the words form properly to apologise. But what could I say? I felt as though nothing in the cosmos could cause me more pain than I was feeling at that moment. But it wasn't about me. It was about him. Because of me the world was in danger and Hercules had lost everything he had ever worked to make. I wanted to die.

I look up at the heavens above, dark, swirling, mysterious and huge. To think that I jeopardised all of this for **my** freedom; I jeopardised his trust and yes, his love too. I **did** try to make it up to him. I couldn't let him die. I just couldn't. The moment I saw that pillar leaning and tottering, I knew I loved him. I know it sounds incredibly cheesy and sappy but, my heart panicked when I thought I might lose him. So I leapt in the way. It was such a simple thing to do. To give my life up, I mean. The sound of his scream still fills me. He screamed because **he** thought me might lose **me**. After all I did to him he still loved me. My organs were crushed and I knew I was dying, I had to tell him! So I did. It'd be nice to think that that gave him the strength to defeat Hades. Maybe it did, but I'm not sure. 

Life is about sacrifice. I know I've made my share of them, but nothing like his. Get this; first the guy gives up his strength to set me free, then he risks his life rescuing my soul from the underworld (oh yeah I know about that, I'm sharp) and then he gives up his dream for me! Immortal life and the power of being a God! When I came to and breathed in the air of new life, I felt the way I baby must feel. The world that had treated me so cruelly was now a wonderful place full of promise and hope. I woke to that face, handsome and strong, but with a kindness that was natural. He was a God! The words replay themselves in my head over and over.

"Wonderboy…wha…why did you?…"

"People always do crazy things…when they're in love"

And then he took me in his arms. And what a pair of arms to be taken in! I hug myself closer trying to remember the soft strength of his palms on my waist. The next few moments are still a blur even though they happened only a few short hours ago. But I was suddenly at the gates of heaven. It was spectacular. Like nothing I had ever imagined! And he looked to me for reassurance I pushed him on. He was going to accomplish his dream! Up there I could see his face shining as he met his mother and father for the first time in almost eighteen years. Hera and Zeus! The greatest Gods on Mount Olympus! They are his parents! The mind still boggles. But it only took a few instants for my new outlook on the world to begin to fade. 

Suddenly I realised this was goodbye. He was going to become a God, immortal and idolised by the world. And I would be here, all alone again. I couldn't ask him to leave his dream, not after everything he had done for me. What is it they say? When you love something enough, sometimes you have to let it go. I understood that. I was finally in love and I had run full cycle. Now I had to stay pining forever afterwards. I'd be surrounded my whole life by temples, statues, songs, vases, everything, would be devoted to him. And it would break my heart. 

But just as I turned to accept my fate he spoke. I don't remember the exact words, because all I could hear was the blood rushing to my head as the tears mounted on my eyelashes. But I do remember the end of this sentence as his fingertips suddenly gripped my hand gently. My heart was beating like the tide against the rocks and my knees were weak. I can feel butterflies in my stomach as I think about it even now. He looked at me and said the words I had waited my whole existence to hear.

"A life without Meg, even an immortal life, would be empty…I wish to stay on Earth with her"

I collapsed against his chest, feeling it's breadth and felt his strong arms surround me completely. I heard a chuckle rise up his throat and I moaned in satisfaction. I was home just where I had always wanted to be. And as though reading my mind he said what I had been thinking.

"I finally know where I belong"

I can't even remember the way I felt, it was just such a burst of emotions. I don't think I'll ever feel that way again. Not to say I'll never feel as good as that again, but **that** was something else! And then, then he filled a huge hole in me. He put his lips to mine. It was gentle, but I wanted to thank him for everything he had done. He was now my world. Nothing but Hercules would ever matter. I pulled him closer and I could feel a delighted chuckle in his throat as he tightened his embrace around me. For a moment I forgot I was standing on the most holy soil on earth surrounded by beings a thousand times more important than I would ever be. Because his touch was on me and his mouth was against mine, I was more important than any of them

Then…why do I feel like this now? Why don't I feel good enough? Why I do feel like I'm the only one not in on the party? I dunno, I'm too tired to think about it just now anyway. Hercules deserves this, who am I to rain on his parade? I stand up and walk over to the edge of the balcony and let the cool night breezes play with my hair. I don't know if I can ever show my gratitude or show all my love for him. Sure I've been changed since I met him, but there's still a part of me that protects itself. That's what's making me so gosh-darned uncomfortable on this exquisite veranda. I don't know if I can satisfy him.

"Whatcha doin' out here?" That soft yet powerful and innocent voice asks affectionately, coming as a welcome disturbance to my thoughts. I turn around to see his figure standing in the lit doorway. Sounds of merriment and music emanate from the large room behind him. He nudges the large bronze door closed a little, allowing us some quiet. I can tell from the way he shifts in his sandals that he's nervous about something. I smile genuinely, every time he speaks or smiles or even breathes I find something else about him that I fall in love with. Right now he moves towards a pillar holding up the shade above our heads. He tries to play it cool but I can see through that.

"Nuthin' much, I just had to get some air" I say casually, trying not to let on any of my previous thoughts. I let my eyes wander for a moment or two as he comes and stands next to me by the railing. Those thick muscular legs show nothing of their true speed or power as they curve deliciously under his armour. His waist tapers to a masculine slope allowing his chest to broaden and a pair of strong golden shoulders bulge out from his cape. His biceps are tensed slightly as he leans forward and lays his hand over his forearms. His neck, so blocky and robust, holds his head levelly as he gazes out at the city, very much awake and alive. In his eyes I see that same childish liveliness that I had first found unbelievable. Their pale blue dances and sparkles and now as he turns them on me I can't help but feel my heart skipping in an irregular rhythm. 

"Yeah I understand, it's madness in there!" He chuckles. We're interrupted as Phil's Brooklyn brawl rises above everyone else in a drunken slur followed by the room erupting in fits of laughter. We both smile. "Looks like someone's having a good time" I comment leaning my back against the railing. I turn my gaze and he's staring at me, love shining in those irresistible eyes. He straightens up and comes a little closer, but I can't look back at him. I amble off, trying to figure out what to say to him. But he follows me around the other side of the fountain. I can feel his gentle touch caressing my arm. "Meg? What's wrong?" I feel the water building up in my eyes. But he turns me around softly and struggles to capture my gaze. 

"Meg?…" He pleads. I look up and can't resist the honest and loving concern I see in his eyes. I sigh, accepting defeat. "Herc…" I turn my head away from him. "I love you…but I don't how to do this. Nothing's ever worked before" He is silent so I look at him to make sure he understands me. I'm rather surprised to find him suppressing an embarrassed smirk. "Herc? What is it?" I ask feeling a funny smile of curiosity coming to my own lips. His eyes dart up at mine and he laughs then envelops me totally and unexpectedly in his strong arms. "Meg…you shouldn't be ashamed to feel that way. I'm not very experienced in this area either, but I know one thing. This **is** where I belong." I snuggle closer and listen to his heartbeat. "You're all I'll ever need"

I look up at him. That cheeky little spiral of ginger hair peeking out over his head-band touches the end of my nose as he leans towards me instinctively. I feel his lips touching mine and I lean into the kiss. His gentle fingers stroke my back and I feel lost in him. Lost in Hercules. The strongest man alive, a demi-god, a man who knows what love truly is. The thought of how amazing he is makes me want to cry. And now I realise…He's mine, He's all mine…forever. He's right. We belong together. We've found what we each were so desperate to find. Something so real and binding, we didn't need to be good at it, but just good with one another. He's all I'll ever need…he's all I have. I clutch his waist closer to me and deepen the kiss so much that he pulls away slowly. Hercules smiles lovingly and pushes a curl away from my check. In an instant he scoops me up in his arms and he carries me off to retire for the night.

We've had a **long** day.


End file.
